It is with heavy heart that I write this.

I have a male cousin who is five years older than me. He is 32 years of age. Had lived with his parents and siblings outside the country before, and returned back to Nigeria about 10years ago. Born with a silver spoon but planlessness on the part of his parents sent them back to poverty after retirement. After retirement, the father passed on the next year.

This guy is addicted to ICE. I didn't know what ice was until I saw him taking it. I had heard a lot about it and I never expected to see my own family member getting involved in such. At first, he was hiding it from me, but at a time he couldn't. His closest friend already confided in me about it, so I was only just waiting to see for myself.

Aside taking ice, he smokes Weed, Colos, loud and cigarettes even even laughing gas.

It's painful to me because he's the first child and only son now, and has four younger sisters.

He has become almost completely irresponsible at his age. He doesn't have a rented apartment of his own, always squatting with people here and there. Always asking for money from friends and even me. You can give him your last card today, and the next day, he's making another demand on you for same money. If you give him a job to do today, the next week, he's out of the job. If this guy needs money from you, he will first text you, flash you, use his system(laptop) to msg you on WhatsApp. He will make sure he flashes and messages you until he gets same money from you. He will make sure he bombards you with lots of calls and messages.


He's so disorganized and unorganized. He's always running into trouble here and there. Either he's buying a stolen phone at a very cheap price and getting arrested later or he's been accused of theft and locked up in the police cell. So many similar cases. Today, he can't afford a smart phone. He uses a torchlight phone, he has changed the screen of the torchlight phone three times in two months.

His mum already sidelined him in the scheme of things going on in the family. The mum has written him off completely because the guy hasn't lived up to expectation. The mum isn't aware of another other drugs, she thinks her son only smokes just weed and cigar. But it is way beyond that.

Guys, how do I help this guy out of this? I'm bothered because I like him and want to the Best for him. Even if I report to the elders in our family, he wouldn't still stop. He's an adult, and how do you start monitoring and policing him?

I can't do this alone because he's really gone deep in this. He's always always Broke. He has lost the respect of his younger sisters and friends due to his incessant begging. Each time I see his call, my heart skips. Because I already know what is coming.
Again, he's someone who isn't transparent at all. Not straightforward too. Very cunning. If he has money today, you wouldn't know. For instance, if he has a thousand naira today and you only just have fifty naira on you, this guy would tell you he has nothing and would try to get the whole or fraction of that fifty naira from you. That's how bad it is.