Nigerians speak to GODFREY GEORGE and CHIJIOKE IREMEKA on what they would do if they found out that their partner hid their HIV status from them until after marriage
I’ll have a candid discussion on the way forward – David Ibukunoluwa Falade
I have never been a fan of deceit in my life. It hurts so bad. But I will try to understand why they tried to hide it in the first place and put myself in their shoes. We are no longer talking about a relationship; we are talking about marriage. So, I think the best thing to say right now is to keep the conversation open and ask myself the genuine question, “Will I be able to be with this person beyond this?”
I won’t end things with them – Melody Samuel
I will feel betrayed and lied to because my health is at risk. I have nothing against being with someone who’s HIV positive; however, disclosing one’s status enables me to make decisions that protect both of us. I would also be at ease knowing they’re using anti-retroviral medication.
So, what will I do? Talk to them. I won’t end things (except if they knowingly made me contract it). I will talk things out with them and hopefully reach a compromise. I’m aware of the stigma around HIV and why my partner would have kept it hidden. Nevertheless, this concerns me as we’re married and are Intimacy ually intimate.
I may end things with them – Smith Doxazo
I don’t like lies, and something as serious as HIV should be discussed long before marriage is brought up. Let them not deny me the right to decide to be with them despite HIV. Of course, we know HIV is not a death sentence, but I need to be sure that I can trust you enough with my health. It is a terrible situation to be in, but I hope they understand that whatever decision I take was based on what they gave me.
Marriage cannot be built on deceit – Aniedi Akpan
Since I have no issues with anyone with HIV, lying and deceit are things I cannot condone, especially in marriage. How can we go on in that marriage when you are already lying about your status? You want to endanger my life, and you don’t want me to have a say about it? It is hurtful, honestly, and I think no one should do that. I know people can be horrible and can go about spreading the news of that person’s status, but it is more honourable than lying through their teeth.
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